Tag Archives: patience

In a Mirror World

We all have this ideal of how we want to look, what we want our lives to be like, how we want to live etc.  I know that I definitely have this narrow field of how I want(ed) everything to look.  However, the fact of the situation is that nothing could be farther from what I desire.  My current place in life isn’t even remotely close to what I had envisioned at 29.

The first step to fixing a problem is realizing there is one.

I know there is a problem, I know that I have problems that need fixing.  Like I stated a couple weeks ago, I don’t even know where to begin.  Recently, it feels like I am stuck in the hallway of life, surrounded by doors and none of them unlocked.  I have felt like I have supported many in pushing forward and finding their unlocked doors of destiny and yet I cannot seem to find mine. My list of problems is broad but my understanding of how to begin fixing them is limited.

I am writing this from a place of honesty.  Writing this from a place of confusion in my life.  As we look at the mirror of our lives and view the reflection staring back at us, we cannot compare it to others.  Something I still do frequently.  I wish I had/was/could ________ (insert desire here).  We begin to formulate this list of things we find wrong in our lives and forget the list of blessings.  We formulate this list of things we wish we had, could do, were etc and get so blindsided by these things that we prevent ourselves from looking at the positive circumstances around us.

This is a place I have backed myself into, I have cornered myself with what I don’t have and zeroed in on those things and the good around me has become a blur.

Instead of trying to put everything back together at once, I need to take a single piece, figure out where it belongs and go from there.  Take each piece at a time and examine them before moving on to the next piece.  I need to take each area of my life, take that piece,look at it from all angles and find out how to put it back into its place.  And I need to be okay with finding pieces that no longer belong and throwing them out.  It is going to be a painful process where I am going to have to remove shards that have embedded themselves into my flesh.  However, I have to remember that it is all about slow slicing success.  No matter how painful it is going to be.

Hack it up into chunks

I may also need to take pieces and cut them up into separate chunks so that they will fit better as part of the whole.  If I want to lose over 100 pounds over the next year, I need to cut up the weight loss into smaller parts and focus on meeting the smaller goals and quit focusing on the end game.  If I want to move out, make more money, lose weight, get out of debt etc then I need to take the pieces one by one and refit them into the whole picture I have for my life. I need to quit focusing on the shattered image I see of myself and my life in the mirror and change my perspective to see the individual pieces that need fixing.

It is going to suck, it is going to hurt. I have to endure.  I need to endure.  I cannot see the completed picture, I can only see what is in front of my right now and I need to attack a section at a time and quit worrying about the whole image.  It will come together in time, I need to be patient with my future and more importantly with myself.  All things will work out for good in the end.

Let me know what parts of your life you want/need to fix.  Would love comments, thoughts, suggestions.  Thanks folks!

Mirror
Heart

Advertisements