Tag Archives: motivation

In a Mirror World

We all have this ideal of how we want to look, what we want our lives to be like, how we want to live etc.  I know that I definitely have this narrow field of how I want(ed) everything to look.  However, the fact of the situation is that nothing could be farther from what I desire.  My current place in life isn’t even remotely close to what I had envisioned at 29.

The first step to fixing a problem is realizing there is one.

I know there is a problem, I know that I have problems that need fixing.  Like I stated a couple weeks ago, I don’t even know where to begin.  Recently, it feels like I am stuck in the hallway of life, surrounded by doors and none of them unlocked.  I have felt like I have supported many in pushing forward and finding their unlocked doors of destiny and yet I cannot seem to find mine. My list of problems is broad but my understanding of how to begin fixing them is limited.

I am writing this from a place of honesty.  Writing this from a place of confusion in my life.  As we look at the mirror of our lives and view the reflection staring back at us, we cannot compare it to others.  Something I still do frequently.  I wish I had/was/could ________ (insert desire here).  We begin to formulate this list of things we find wrong in our lives and forget the list of blessings.  We formulate this list of things we wish we had, could do, were etc and get so blindsided by these things that we prevent ourselves from looking at the positive circumstances around us.

This is a place I have backed myself into, I have cornered myself with what I don’t have and zeroed in on those things and the good around me has become a blur.

Instead of trying to put everything back together at once, I need to take a single piece, figure out where it belongs and go from there.  Take each piece at a time and examine them before moving on to the next piece.  I need to take each area of my life, take that piece,look at it from all angles and find out how to put it back into its place.  And I need to be okay with finding pieces that no longer belong and throwing them out.  It is going to be a painful process where I am going to have to remove shards that have embedded themselves into my flesh.  However, I have to remember that it is all about slow slicing success.  No matter how painful it is going to be.

Hack it up into chunks

I may also need to take pieces and cut them up into separate chunks so that they will fit better as part of the whole.  If I want to lose over 100 pounds over the next year, I need to cut up the weight loss into smaller parts and focus on meeting the smaller goals and quit focusing on the end game.  If I want to move out, make more money, lose weight, get out of debt etc then I need to take the pieces one by one and refit them into the whole picture I have for my life. I need to quit focusing on the shattered image I see of myself and my life in the mirror and change my perspective to see the individual pieces that need fixing.

It is going to suck, it is going to hurt. I have to endure.  I need to endure.  I cannot see the completed picture, I can only see what is in front of my right now and I need to attack a section at a time and quit worrying about the whole image.  It will come together in time, I need to be patient with my future and more importantly with myself.  All things will work out for good in the end.

Let me know what parts of your life you want/need to fix.  Would love comments, thoughts, suggestions.  Thanks folks!

Mirror
Heart

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The Bigger Picture

3 Weeks! What has happened in the past three weeks?  A lot that is for sure.  I lost my job a week and a half ago, went from affordable income to zero, lost 5 lbs in weight, a friend is moving back to NY and I began to question my direction in life again.  One thing that is still a constant in my life is no dateable prospects, there is some good news!

Don’t be alarmed, I am not questioning my decision and direction with AMTC, I am confident and firm in that direction.  I know that the situation of how I became fired is shrouded in mystery and unexplained with reasons that I may never receive.  However, one thing I do know is that I shall not give up on the dream and desires upon my heart.  Speaking of which I recently updated my Epic Quest of Epic-ness!  Check it out, I am on my way to Level 4 in life! YAY!

Anywho, I am sitting at Starbucks attempting to find jobs and I cannot seem to focus on the elusive search.   So I sit and stare out of the windows and watch the world stroll on by, aka people watching.  You can thank my Grandmother and Mother for my adept roll at people watching and being super observant.  I am thinking about life, the books I recently read, my current track in life and what I am going to write about.  Then it hits me, an image comes to my mind.

Not exactly this specific image, but you get the point.

Building a Puzzle!  Different thoughts and revelation came fumbling together.  My life has been full of attempts, trials, success and a great pile of failures. (Irrelevant note: type in pile of failures under google images and you get failed architecture and collapsed buildings.)

Our lives are like building a puzzle, the first opening of that box and we look at all those little interconnecting pieces and go “Good Lord how am I going to put this all together?”  We dump the box out and at least for me, you begin looking for the edge pieces to start forming the base work of the puzzle.  During this process of sorting through hundreds, if not thousands of pieces, you find like tiles, stick them together and put them off to the side.

Soon enough you have most of the frame of the puzzle assembled and an assortment of meaningless united tiles that have a piece of the complete image with no clue how it fits into the jigsaw.  Slowly but surely and bit by bit you begin to amass the jigsaw puzzle together like the image on the box and you can see what it is suppose to resemble.

How does this fit into my life?

Brilliant question.  It came to me like this; the base work of the puzzle is us, who we are, our identity, hopes, dreams, passions and desires.  Contained within this wall, that is a interconnected work of atoms (the jigsaw frame), you find an image that must be put together (the rest of the loose pieces). During our lives we try things, attempt new ideas, projects, business possibilities etc.  We have successes and failures, wisdom and knowledge to apply to future attempts.

Those are the pieces that we complete in little groups scattered outside the puzzle groundwork.  Piece by piece we find the bits that connect to the architecture of our dreams and carefully put the image together.  Then revelation hits and we find where a collection of 5-6 pieces fits into the bigger picture and another and another.  All those successes and failures have practical application for our future and in ascertaining our dreams.  Sooner or later we step back and see that that puzzle, that in the beginning was a myriad of pieces and edges, has now come together to form a finished and clear image.

This is a huge revelation for me because I was thinking about where am I going to go next, what am I going to do?  Now I need to sort through those groupings dispersed around my puzzle and find where they fit into the frame.  I have dozens of combinations laying on the outside, i need to begin putting them together and see what skills and wisdom I have learned from my 28 years of experience and apply myself towards my dreams.

I encourage you today Nerds and Nerdettes, don’t become discouraged at your failures, attempts and lack of direction.  Take a step back and begin to analyze where all those clusters of pieces belong and then decide which direction to take from there.  There are times that we stare at a certain piece for so long and our vision gets hazy because we forget that there are oodles of other pieces to put together.  If one doesn’t fit, put the piece down and move on, there will come a time, down the road, that that piece will come back into place and find it’s place perfectly.

I would love to hear your comments, suggestions etc.  Go out and assemble your jigsaw puzzle today nerds!

Droids? What Droids?!

Our biggest setback when getting into shape or progressing forward with our dreams is Mindset.  We tell ourselves that just one more cookie and then we will stop, I can sleep another half-hour and then I will get up to work out etc.  We all have said these things to ourselves whether in relation to doing homework, working out, eating or whatever, we are our own worst motivators.  With a snap of our fingers we can convince ourselves to eat that bag of oreos or watch another episode on Netflix and before we know it the bag is empty or 5 hours have gone by and we are ready for the next season.

I am extremely guilty of this, I confess, I did it just this morning.  Instead of getting up at 7:30 like I originally planned, I slept till I had to get up to take a shower before my schedule for the day started.  However, to make up for it I worked out after lunch, when I came home from my meeting. Today doing my circuit was easier than on monday, I even pushed myself a little farther.  I skipped Wednesday because of the excuse that I didn’t want to and actually I was still extremely sore from Monday.  But it is amazing how you feel after a good workout, I actually laid there on the floor for a few and grinned because I pushed myself a bit farther than Monday.  That “buzz” you get, (aka adrenaline) from exercising is way better than from food, drugs, cigarettes etc plus you are getting yourself healthier and more fit every time you do it.

I would consider that a Win-Win situation!  Wouldn’t you?

Our Mindset, or Willpower or motivation is all a mental process.  Instead of saying “I can’t” or “Maybe Later,” just get up and DO IT NOW! Get it over with, so to speak, and just go through your workout circuit.  I mean it, put the laptop down, or the smartphone, step away from the computer and go do your workout, NOW!  Then when you are done you can come back and finish reading this!

We play mind games with ourselves so often that we have stopped ourselves before we even thought of getting started.  For me, I have started telling myself that “I don’t eat sweets.”  Or even “I don’t eat cheese.”  You don’t realize how much effort that takes off the mental game when you already tell yourself that you don’t, instead of I can’t because that leaves a weak spot in your armor for you to take the offer later on in the day to consume copious amounts of that substance.  Now don’t use the phrase to not workout, that is just a defeatist mentality and if you really want to see the YOU buried under that excess weight then we cannot think that way.  When it comes to exercising, forgo saying “I can’t” instead say “I don’t skip a workout session.”  See the difference from “I don’t exercise,” to “I don’t skip workouts.”?  Already you have given yourself a bit of a mental umph to go do that circuit or routine and “level up your life.” (as Steve Kamb would say.)

Put your game face on and get out of bed or drop that remote and go for a walk, run up and down the stairs a few times, whatever.  Just tell your mind to shut up, that if you want to achieve your goals, dreams, desires and passions then the mental chess match has to stop and you need to get off your lazy bum and push yourself to succeed.  There is also a spiritual side to the mental battle we fight “cause our battle is not with flesh and blood,” but that is not a topic for here.  If you would like my input on the spiritual mental game then leave me a comment and I will write one on my other blog 😉.  Each day push yourself a little bit more and soon enough you won’t have to fight to do it because you will enjoy how you feel, the way you look and the euphoria afterwards and things will be that much easier.

So Go out and Feel the Burn today Nerds 🙂  My thighs are killing me!